Neighbors and friends for over five years, Hank, Bill, Dale and
Boomhauer never tire of each other. OK, well, maybe occasionally.
But that doesn't stop them from firing up the propane grill or sharing
a cold one in the alley while discussing the pros and cons of lawn
maintenance.
On November 27th, 2000, Hank and the guys from King of the Hill chatted with fans online. Here's what they had to say.
FOX Host: Welcome to today's chat with the cast of King
of the Hill. Please start sending in your questions & the guys
will be here shortly. FOX Host: We are ready to get started......Please welcome
the cast of King of the Hill....
Queen_of_the_Hill: What do you guys think of computers and the Internet?
Bill: Part of me would like to get into
meeting women on the Internet. Bill: The other part of me doesn't have a computer.
Dale: I think the Internet knows what
I think of it already.
Hank_Hill: But one good thing that came
out of this election mess is that Al Gore will have lots of time
to get back to the Internet, I guess.
aintright: What do you guys think of the term "redneck?" are you rednecks?
Bill: My neck is more pink and creamy.
Hank_Hill: I don't like to be judged by
the color of my skin between my head and T-shirt!
Dale: Is that some sort of Communist thing,
cuz if it is, I'm against it!!! Dale: And my neck is red, white and blue!
stargarbage: Dale, you're the hottest guy in the US! Do you envy Hank?
Dale: You just answered your own question, and quite eloquently.
stargarbage: Do you think the King of the Hill CD-Rom does justice to the real thing?
Bill: I like it, but the CD-ROM does add
10 pounds.
Hank_Hill: It's the next best thing to takin' a Greyhound down to Arlen!
Dale: In real life, I'm 6'2", 220 pounds
and my hat is not quite so orange.
Boomhauer: Dang ol' waiting for the DVD,
man!
Queen_of_the_Hill: Do any of you guys play computer games? If YES, have you ever played any hunting games on your computer?
Bill: The only computer I play with is
the ATM and it charges me a buck-fifty to play.
Hank_Hill: When the Mario brothers get
out of plumbing and open a propane shop, then I'll think about
it.
Dale: I play war simulations in my basement.
I have brought this country to the brink of war and back, and
sometimes not back!
Hank_Hill: What's the point of playing hunting games? You can't eat a video duck!
Bill: That's not true, Hank, you can put some seasoning
on the screen and lick it.
Dale: I don't need to play hunt...I hunt
the real McCoy... Dale: rats, ants, roaches, silverfish, centipedes.... Dale: Stop it, I'm scarin' myself!
TexasGrrl: Boomhauer, where would you take a girl on a date?
Boomhauer: My hot tub, man, dang ol' comin'-of-age
story in the Boom lagoon, man.
rushfan3: Dale, what's the best way to deal with federal agents?
Dale: Pleasantly and politely. You think
you can trick me, Mr. Greenspan? Have a nice day!
Nogman: Hank, do you think that Bobby will one day follow your footsteps into the propane business?
Hank_Hill: If there's a God in heaven,
I would think this would be a priority.
toocool: Bill why did your wife leave you
Bill: My wife did not leave me, we're just
in the middle of a little seven-year break.
howdy: boomhauer, what's your IQ?
Boomhauer: Dang ol' not polite to brag,
man...170.
lonewolfdave: Dale, are you really a special agent for the secret service?
Dale: That's what the Secret Service would
like you to think...and the ATF and the CIA, the FBI...and the
NFC and the Michelin Tire Corporation.
rushfan3: Hank, what will become of the Dallas Cowboys this season?
Hank_Hill: They will still be the greatest
football team on Earth. Hank_Hill: It just won't be reflected in their record.
Nogman: Bill, do you think that one day you will find the woman of your dreams?
Bill: I dream of a different woman every night!
Meems: Hey Hank, where's Louann at these days?
Hank_Hill: She's out of harm's way in
a house across the street where, hopefully, she's sewing on a
bottom for her shirts. Hank_Hill: Is this that guy who was following her around?
Hank_Hill: Cuz in that case, I don't have no idea where
she is.
shorty: Hank, so you think you and Peggy will have another kid ever?
Hank_Hill: My heart says yes but my narrow
urethra says no.
Racer_X: Hank, we haven't heard about your narrow urethra in a while. Did you have a "procedure" to repair it?
Hank_Hill: I talked to a doctor about
a procedure, but frankly, he gave me the creeps...the way he was
lookin' at me.
hank_43062: Hank, that boy of yours aint quite right, any plans to straighten him up?
Hank_Hill: Bobby's what they call in the NBA a "project,"
sort of like Dennis Rodman... Hank_Hill: but in Bobby's case, there's hope.
shorty: Hank, what are you most afraid of?
Hank_Hill: I don't like pigeons. Hank_Hill: Don't ask me why, I just don't like 'em.
Scott: Boomhauer, can you ramble off a paragraph or two?
Boomhauer: What am I, your dang ol' monkey,
man?
LOLinHouston: Bill and Dale -- boomhauer is over 40, single, and wears tight black t-shirts. Ever suspect he might be...you know...
Dale: Stylish? Dale: We've suspected that for a long time....
spawn: Dale, how did you become pesident of the N.R.A?
Dale: I am not the president of the NRA,
I am just the president of the local chapter of my local gun club...Charleton
Heston did send me a glossy with a very nice note, though.
johnny: Dale seems less paranoid these days. Is that intentional?
Dale: Who are you????? Dale: Why do you want to know????
Benny_Hill: Who makes the best barbeque in Texas?
Hank_Hill: Like everything else in this country, the answer to that question is going to be decided by the courts.
Dale: Liberal Democrats...splash a little
Worcestshire sauce on them...that's good eatin'...just a joke,
it has never been proven at any time that I have been at any time
a practicing cannibal.
Bill: Hank's wife.... Wait, the question
was about barbeque?
Boomhauer: Dang ol' Mrs. Boomhauer, man,
my mama.
scoot9xyz: hank, which is better bbq with propane or charcoal
Hank_Hill: I'm not gonna even dignify that with a response!
Benny_Hill: Who is the reigning champion at paintball?
Bill: If you're talking about quantity
of paint on one's person, that would be me.
Hank_Hill: I was named Sherwin Williams
exterior/interior Latex customer of the month... Hank_Hill: if that counts for anything.
Dale: I super-charge my paintball gun,
it'll break skin... Dale: mostly mine.
Benny_Hill: Hank, any chance Bobby will be the next Tiger Woods? Will we see him golfing a bit more in the future?
Hank_Hill: I'd settle for Bobby being
the next Corey Pavin. I don't want to push Bobby... Hank_Hill: too hard. Hank_Hill: He had enough trouble with the presidential
fitness test. Hank_Hill: I wouldn't count on him golfing more in the
future, but if Tim Conway comes out with any more hilarious Dorf
golf videos, I'm sure we'll be renting those!
LOLinHouston: hank, have you ever been attaracted to dale's wife?
Hank_Hill: I believe your question is directed at Dale?
stargarbage: Any plans to star in any movies?
Hank_Hill: I don't even have any plans to sit in any movies!
Foxxy: What about making a game based on your lives and the happenings in Arlen?
Hank_Hill: Somebody should come up with
that game. He would be rated E for excitement... Hank_Hill: and G for general audiences, of course.
Dale: G is for gribble. Ass!!!! I mean,
Hank!
Boomhauer: Dang ol' my life is for mature
audiences only, man...talkin' about boom-boom out go the lights!
Bill: I'd like to be in a game with Lara
Croft...locked in a tomb of some sort....
hermione: where can i buy the cd rom game?
Hank_Hill: At fine stores everywhere...where fine CD-ROMs
are sold!
FOX Host: Thanks for chatting with the cast of King
of the Hill. Please send in your goodbyes for the guys!
Hank_Hill: OK, then.
Dale: Yup.
Bill: Yup.
Boomhauer: Yup, yup, yup!
boomhower_2005: BYE BOOMHOWER YOU DA MAN!!!
Phatboy21: Bye
Yooper: good night hank!
Nogman: Bye guys it's been nice chatting with you all.
Alby: Later guys! See you Sunday.
FOX Host: Don't forget to check back tomorrow for the transcript tonight's chat with the cast of King Of The Hill on FOX.com tomorrow!
